The Birds and the Honey Bees

It's a pretty well-known fact that it takes two parents to produce another living animal. One parent contributes one set of chromosomes, the other parent supplies the second set, the genes are mixed at fertilization, and POOF! Offspring capable of carrying on the line of its parents is produced. Count it a win for "genetic diversity."

That's the general gist of "the birds and the bees" in the animal kingdom. Except that one of these namesake creatures defies this conventional wisdom and produces an entire population segment with the, erm, input of just one parent.

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See that one big bee in the middle? All elevendy billion of those bees around her were spawned by her.

Here comes Peter Cottontail, hopping down the bunny trail

In honor of Easter this weekend, this week's post will explore that mammalian reproductive enigma that confuses children across America every spring: the egg-laying Easter Bunny! The origins of this tale (get it? get it?) of an egg-laying mammal are a little fuzzy (double pun! Oh, how I crack myself up!).

The story most likely comes from a German folktale that was introduced to American audiences by immigrants in the 18th century. The German folktale of the "Oschter Haws," a hare that laid nests of brightly colored eggs in children's hats and bonnets every spring, itself has pretty murky origins. The Grimm brothers made a feeble attempt to give the story a little historical credibility by attempting to link it to pre-Christianity pagan myths, but even this was a stretch. Odds are, the story is an amalgamation of historical fertility symbols with new Christian traditions. And, as we are constantly reminded by advertisers every spring, rabbits and Easter are forever intertwined.

Birds and other kinds of dinosaurs

The link between birds and dinosaurs has become increasingly apparent over the years. Although the scientific community is pretty settled on this evolutionary link, debate is sure to continue among the public regarding where this group of animals came from. I'm not here to start an argument about evolution. But, I dare you to get face-to-face with this monstrous bird and not shudder in terror, because you are looking a freaking dinosaur in the eye.

This is what nightmares are made of.

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for Orchids in Our Ice Cream

I'll admit, my knowledge of orchids is pretty limited. I did read Susan Orlean's The Orchid Thief a few years back, but all I really remember about orchids from the book is that they are highly prized for their flowers, yet they are notoriously hard to grow and cultivate. Rare. Delicate. Exquisite. All these ideas come to mind when an orchid is conjured up in my mind. Not "boring-est flavor of ice cream."

Mmm....basic and umodified traditional sweets!

That's right, folks. Vanilla, which Urban Dictionary defines as "unexciting, normal, conventional,boring" is actually a type of orchid. A rare, delicate, exquisite orchid. Due to the difficulty of pollinating and cultivating said orchids, vanilla is the second most expensive spice in the world. Shocking, I know. But wild vanilla orchids, as the all-knowing and always-correct Wikipedia just informed me, are invested in an extremely mutualistic relationship with a Central American species of Melipona bees. These bees are the only things capable of pollinating the vine that produces the vanilla flower. The only things other than humans, that is. If you really wanted to cultivate your very own vanilla, you could painstakingly swab a small stick onto some orchids and transfer the pollen onto other orchids. One by one. By yourself. In the tropics. All the time.

Yes, this is a white orchid. No, this is not a vanilla orchid. But you get the idea.

Of course, growers do this a lot to produce pure vanilla, and this vanilla is available for a (pricey) purchase at supermarkets. Or, you could do what I do, and purchase a bottle of synthetic vanilla extract from Kroger for about a buck, and dream about the day when you can afford the real stuff. Or move to Central America and start your own vanilla orchid enterprise.